How to Hang With Yourself on V-Day

10 Innovative + Easy Ideas for a Fun VDAY (single or partnered)

1. Classic: Take a Bubble Bath

Time Investment: 30 Minutes
Supplies: Organic Bubble Bath Soap, Bathtub, Clean Water
The Gist: Soak. Relax. Touch Your Sexy Soapy Self.

2. Foodie: Chocolate Making Ceremony

Time Investment: 15 Minutes
Supplies: Raw Cacao, Coconut Oil, Coconut Sugar or Agave, Fav Playlist
The Gist: Get into the kitchen and make yourself or someone you love some raw chocolates.
As you make them, listen to your fav’ tunes and visualize love pouring out from your heart, through your hands, and into your chocolate!

3. Badass: Write a Love Letter to a Stranger

Time Investment: 10-30 Minutes
Supplies: Paper, Pen, Envelope, optional: stickers and glitter
The Gist: Write a love letter to a complete stranger you’ve never met. Write everything you wish for them in their life, how you wish they would feel about themselves and value themselves, and how you imagine them to be. Address the envelope with smth like “Finders Keepers” or “Love Letter from a Stranger” and either leave it in a very easily accessible public place, like a coffee-shop table or on a subway seat!

4. “Free Hugs”: Make Candy Grams with Cute Notes and Hand them Out in a Public Place

Time Investment: 30 minutes – 2 hours
Supplies: Organic candy, baggies, colored paper, permanent markers, ribbon
The Gist: Fill up little bags with candy and add a handwritten note – hand them out to strangers in public and wish them a Happy Vday!

5. Adventure:  Spontaneous “Weekend Getaway” within your own city

Time Investment: 30 minutes (to book) – 2 days (to enjoy)
Supplies: Creditcard, AirBnB, Pajamas
The Gist: Check yourself into a new home for the weekend. Pamper yourself when there – watch movies, order in from fancy places or new places, and just relax for all of Saturday+Sunday. Single? Invite friends over for a slumber party – or just finally enjoy some quality alone-time and some sleep!

6. Ballsy: Use Tinder to go on 3 Tinder Dates

Time Investment: 20-60 minutes to find + set updates
Supplies: Feel-good outfit
The Gist: Just go out with random strangers, have a good time, and don’t take it (too) seriously! Go get some vegan ice cream together, hit the movies, or even try some bowling!

7. Romantic: Buy yourself some SUPER SEXY underwear or lingerie

Time Investment: 1-2 hours
Supplies: Credit card
The Gist: Go shopping for hot undies. Preferably made from organic cotton, and fairtrade. Wear them all year and remember how you’re a bottomless pit of pleasure!

8. Arts+Crafts: Vision Board of Love

Time Investment: 1 Hour
Supplies: Magazines, cardboard/thickpaper, scissors, glue, some fantasy
The Gist: Create a Vision Board that speaks to the kind of ways you want to experience LOVE in the next year. It can be a mini-board, no bigger than your own head! Put it on your altar, or hang it on your mirror!

9. Feel Good: Make a donation to a Kickstarter campaign that your heart feels called to

Time Investment: 30min – 1 hour
Supplies: Paypal + laptop
The Gist: Check out all the passionate work coming from the hearts of people worldwide, on Kickstarter, and link your heart up to theirs and offer them a vote of confidence and support in their dream!

10. Indulgent: Order Every Dessert On the Menu at your Favorite Restaurant or Dessert Spot

Time Investment: 1 Hour
Supplies: Hunger, Fork
The Gist: Go into your fav. spot to eat, and order every single dessert on their menu. If you must, order it to go so you can go home and pig-out in private. You can take one bite of everything, and then go-deep on the top 2-3 options.
(pssst! I did this once at PeaceFoodsCafe – a delicious vegan restaurant in NYC. It was legendary. Their biscuits – o.m.g.)

SO PICK ONE (or two, or a few) AND CELEBRATE YOURSELF ALL WEEKEND BABY!!
Upload your experience to instagram and be sure to tag @coach_antonia so I can peep your love-ly day!

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The REAL Reason You’re Mean to Yourself

You’re probably worried about yourself.

  • Why aren’t you good enough?
  • Why did you just make the same mistake, again?
  • Why aren’t you better?
  • Why is everyone else getting it, but you?
  • Why are you so unlovable?

You’re not wrong, bad, unlovable, or unworthy.

You’re Vain.

Or, to be accurate – you’re behaving vainly.

Self Criticism is a heightened form of vanity. Tweet this.

You’re obsessing over yourself.
Whether its positive or negative, is irrelevant.

Did you fuck everything up again?
Nobody gives a shit (they’re too busy on Instagram.)
Get Over It and Yourself. Move On.

Great News!

Vanity is not WHO you are. It’s a learned and appropriated behavior.
You can begin to shift your inner dialogue by becoming aware of it.
When you notice it you can either say…
 “Oh shit, i’m doing it wrong, again, oh god, i’m a helpless case, and i’ll never get anything right in my life, and even if i do, it will all go to shit anyways, and yes my mean mom was right about me…” 
OR
You can just STOP. Stop giving a shit about what the mirror, mirror in your head says about you and how terrible and incapable you are. 

Say to yourself, “I’m currently being extremely vain, for which i immediately forgive myself, and am choosing to transform right now.”

Change the Frequency on Your Self-Talk Radio.

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: Pay attention to what goes through your head, and notice the moments when you have the choice to drown in judgmental thoughts about yourself OR to stop giving a shit. Make a choice. Make it consciously.

www.coachantonia.com

Eating healthy is boring, expensive and plain… Or Is It? 

Healthy Living has some old, stale PR from the days when eating your overcooked peas was recommended as a good idea.

Thanks to the mis-guided ol’-school, from the days when doctors even recommended cigarettes for throat aches, your idea of what healthy living looks like could be out-dated. 

Lets get you up to date, easy and fast, about what it looks like to be healthy TODAY. 

OLD: Eating healthy is boring!

Broiled chicken with steamed broccoli. Over and over again.
More steamed vegetables. Plain rice. An apple.
And then having to count the calories to all of it.

WOW! That sounds like a NIGHTMARE!

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NEW: Eating healthy is a fun, fresh and innovative! 

Pulled, pickled and jerked carrots with peanut mole sauce on carrot waffles.
Spinach Mille-feuille with grapefruit ricotta and smoked pistachios. (available at Dirt Candy in NYC)
Sweet Potato Brownies

Need I say more?

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OLD: Eating healthy is expensive. 

Yes, i know those crazy farmer’s marketers who charge $8 for a single round, fat and juicy heirloom tomato – but times’a’changin.

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NEW: Healthy food is becoming democratic.

A must-have for all. It’s access is becoming a social rights issue: have you heard of food deserts, food racism and environmental racism? These are issues that aren’t just being swept under the rug anymore. 

On the individual level you can: 

  • grow your own food (not kidding),
  • sign up for a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture – you sign up for a farm and they deliver the season’s bounty weekly to your house),
  • cook at home and have potlucks with friends,
  • build relationships at the farmers market and get great deals.

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OLD: Eating healthy is plain. 

Healthy Food used to be its own cuisine. Gross Lean TV dinners that required microwaving. SlimFastShakes that tasted every bit as chemical and over-processed as they were. Color- and flavor-less lettuce, with an over-processed fat-free sauce. 

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NEW: It’s a holistic approach to life.

Healthy food is no longer a weight-loss industry buzzword.
It’s an approach that engages the senses in selecting, cooking, and enjoying food.
It’s about whole-foods.
It’s about eating seasonal, local, organic and heirloom.
It’s about learning to beauty of prickly pear and nopales in SoCal and discovering your winter roots and seasonal microgreens in NYC. And everything in between!

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Who defines what eating healthy means?

 WE DO. 

Lets CHOOSE and CLAIM the most heavenly, nourishing, and pleasurable experience of the word we possibly can! 

Andalé my peoples! Eat Well!

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What to Do When You’re Homeless – and how to deal with any situation that’s rubbing you the wrong way.

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I’m homeless.
Again.
Has that ever happened to you?

Picture this:
You’re living with your relative in a foreign city.
You go on a weekend trip, on a train…overnight train.
On your way home, your relative calls you in the middle of the night.
They say, “Hey, I’m sick with an extremely contagious and unpleasant disease, and you can’t come home for 21 days!”

Where do you go?
What do you do?

Well, in my case, i arrived at the train station at 6am, and called my cousin who graciously let me come to his house. Now am in a hotel temporarily, until i figure out what to do for the remaining 20 days.

So imagine you’re left suddenly homeless, in a foreign and expensive city.
no notice.
no sleep.
nowhere to go.
no plan.
no desire to become a burden to other local relatives.

no access to your things.
no clothes.
no work stuff.
no beloved blender.
no vegan rabbit food.

no PJs.
no undies.
no socks.
no extra $.

You could choose to be …pretty pissed. moody. Huff&Puff.
You could say…”WHY UNIVERSE? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?

OR

You could say… “What if i had CHOSEN this situation and created it, intentionally? Why did i choose this? What do I love about it?”

In response you might realize….

YES. I’ve fantasized ’bout moving-out anyways.

YES. I can experience how i am supported no matter what.
YES. I get to feel the exhilaration and rush of adventure.
YES. I get to feel like a backpacker and on the road again.
YES. I get to feel resourceful and scrappy.

YES. I get to spend some extra time with my cousin.
YES. I get to live in a hotel, and realize that i don’t want to live in a hotel, and how much i want my own place.
YES. I created the perfect opportunity for the Universe to put me into a new, better home for me.
YES. I created an impetus and justification to buy some new underwear (and maybe socks!) 

Next time you are in a situation or circumstance that you don’t like, today, IMAGINE that you had CHOSEN it, and ask yourself,
“What did I want this? What is the gift in this?”

Then FOCUS on the answer.
ENERGY GOES WHERE ATTENTION FLOWS.
And we all know simple maths: Energy + Attention + Intention = Your Reality.

DON’T SLACK! Try It Now!
In the comments write one sentence about a situation that you dislike or are resisting.
Imagine that you had actually chosen it, and write why you might have done that, and what there is to enjoy about it.

WORK IT LADIES and GENTS!
love always

Antonia

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Why You Absolutely Must Sleep with a Teddy Bear Again!

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A quick google search online will show you headlines that state what should be obvious, but is sadly neglected or forgotten in our society , like…

  • Hugs Lower Blood Pressure
  • Hugs Reduce Stress
  • Hugs Reduce Anxiety
  • Hugs are Healing

According to Positivemed.com, “A study found hugging reduces worries and fears, even fear of death. The study also found that hugging a non-living object like a teddy bear or pillow can produce the same result.” 

HUGS AREN’T JUST YUMMY AND DELICIOUS, THEY’RE ALSO GREAT FOR YOUR HEALTH AND EMOTIONAL WELLBEING. Tweet this.

Hugs are, in fact, SO good for you – and it really don’t matter what you hug.

‘Course you might like it more with a breathing being, but don’t be picky! 

A hug is better than no hug.
A cuddle is better than no cuddle.

What Is a Real Hug?

The average hug between people is apparently a measly 3 seconds.
Research shows that a hug can only truly reveal its full-effects of healing at 20 seconds.

This is what most of us do to hug people, but is actually a Straight Up Shitty Hug:

Alison & Kelli

Here is what a REAL HUG looks like – yes, squish up all into each others arms:

REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE:

This year someone gifted me a stuffed lamb as a gift, and one day it was just hangin’ on my bed, and I randomly decided to give it a cuddle and fall asleep like a wee-babe with it in my arms.
It seemed strange – but it was an intuitive reaction, and it just felt GOOD.

I made it a habit. 

A week or two later, i coincidentally saw a study saying that in fact it is so good for us to hug and cuddle, that they truly recommended sleeping with stuffed animals…AS ADULTS.  


TAKE ACTION:

So, you might be too cool for SkOoL and all….but might you consider investing in a hassle-free fuzzy friend and sleep with a teddy (or lamb?)

Perhaps you have a wonderful soulmate that warms your bed. Make sure ya’ll are going the extra-mile to get all ovaaaa each other! Take time for cuddling. Seriously.

Perhaps you sleep solo…in which case, you (like me), might adopt a lamb…or bear… or lil’ dragon.

Re-discover the long-lost joys of sleeping with a stuffed animal. It Really Rocks.

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4 Easy Steps when your Environment makes you feel like a stagnant, sloppy, grand piece’o’POOP

Feeling like a shapeless, stagnant, confused BLOB?

Main Takeaway: Recognize the environment, which is impacting you to feel impotent, dull, and heavy, as a gift. Navigate this time with compassion.

Our Environments have a BIG influence on us. 

We are not made of impenetrable steel. 

We are human, and part of our beauty is in the DANCE we dance between ourselves, and our surroundings: including people, places, and circumstances. 


THE PEEPS

  • Sometimes the people around us can be a giant distraction. 
  • Sometimes they have really gross energy that makes every room feel like a stuffy tomb.
  • Sometimes their aggression, irrational moods, and distraught manner leaves you wondering how the hell to politely respond or create boundaries, in a loving way, when you just want to yell: “GET THE EFF OUTTA MY SPACE!”Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

THE PLACE

  • Sometimes the sky is gray for days on end. 
  • Sometimes the weather is so cold, you can barely get out of bed in the mornings – and spend an hour getting inspired to crawl out on …ahem…Facebook.
  • Sometimes the air in the city you live in is so polluted, and the streets are full of dirt and grime.
  • Sometimes nobody smiles on the streets, and have really droopy, unhappy faces.
  • Sometimes you’re in a place where there is no food that you love to eat.

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THE POSITION

  • Sometimes the shower available to you makes you feel dirtier after you used it, than before it.
  • Sometimes you don’t have any of your clothes which make you feel comfy, and like you. 
  • Sometimes you don’t know where to go in a new city to get your basic needs met, like where to hit up some yoga, where to buy some clean food, where to buy even toilet paper – everything is a huge project.
  • Sometimes you don’t know how to get around from point A to point B in a new city – and its a huge project, too.
  • Sometimes you don’t feel safe moving around your new city by yourself after dark, which can be after 5 and drains like 1/2 your day.

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SOMETIMES you just feel like a piece of hapless POOP, aimlessly spinning in circles in a toilet to nowhere!
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And SOMETIMES, it aint just YOU. It’s whats around you, and what influences you. 

WHAT DO YOU DO when you’re painfully outside your comfort zone, in an ENVIRONMENT that makes you feel so heavy, like you’re wearing a lead snowsuit?

    1.  EMBRACE IT

  • accept the situation as it is.
    recognize and remember that its not your shortcoming or fault.
    its not the time to hate yourself for “if only i were stronger…” or that you’re somehow not ENOUGH – happy ENOUGH, smart ENOUGH, fast ENOUGH.
  • make peace with and befriend the situation.
    literally call it out, and say  HELLO to it.
    “Hello Circumstances which are making me feel upheaved and floaty. I see you. I understand you are not me. But are currently impacting me right now. Thank you for being here. I’m sure you have some gifts for me. I am ready to receive them in right timing!”

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    2. SLOW DOWN

  • a lawyer once told me to stay positive, but to “adjust my expectations.” Great phrase, right?
    Adjust your expectations of what’s possible during this time, and the pace at which you can do things  – even if your ego has to take a backseat for this.
    Hold yourself to this new standard.
    It might feel like the world will fall apart, and that you gotta keep pushing, but it won’t! (trust me, i’m a health coach :P )
  • Go back to basics. 
    tune into the smaller successes of life, like the fact that you brushed your teeth that morning.
    Be grateful for water.
    For Food.
    For your Breath.
    For the Sky.

 

  3. REACH OUT FOR HELP 

  • There’s no need to suffer in silence.
    Perhaps you have a friend who won’t mind being a sounding board, or just listening.
    Perhaps you could benefit from a therapist.
    Perhaps you just need to JOURNAL.
    Even if you feel isolated in your physical location, if you have internet (which you most likely do, unless you’re in Cuba), you can reach out to ol’ buds or a coach or a therapist from Skype.
    Take action.
    Stop expecting yourself to be perfect all the time and perfectly rise to the occasion in the most perfect way, for perfect’s sake!
    You’re allowed to be a messy human.

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     4. GO FOR IT 

  • There IS at least ONE obvious gift in such situations: the opportunity to learn discipline. Discipline has gotten a bad rap in the past years, and i’ll raise my hand up first to admit a big-time resistance to it, but there’s truly something to it.
    Why do you need it? Well, because its true: in your current circumstance, shiz ain’t gonna fall straight into your lap as easily at first, as it might elsewhere where you know everyone, the sun always shines, and the high speed internet is truly high speed. 
  • Motivation won’t just always BE THERE waiting for you.
    It WILL be too cold outside to go outside, but you’ll still have to go outside if you want to do yoga once a week.
    To create change in your life, you gotta make new habits – and the key word here is truly MAKE. You gotta take action to create something where there was nothing before. Discipline helps here, when motivation has disappeared. 
  • Make an easy-going plan that values CONSISTENCY over quantity or craziness.
    Even if its doing something once a week, or making sure you drink 1.5L of water everyday – its SUPER VALUABLE and key here, during these times.
    Get the basics REALLY rock solid.
    Its easy to let them fly by the wayside when all other grand stuff isn’t making your life exciting. STILL, brush your hair. STILL, brush your teeth (and not just in the morning.) STILL, do 10 pushups every hour. STILL, find a way to do a Random Act of Kindness for another person. Do the BORING STUFF because it will SAVE YOUR LIFE and create the right conditions to lift you back up. This is why discipline is important. To save your friggen life when you yourself don’t even feel like it.

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THE GREATEST SURPRISE RESULTS

It my feel like you are treading through a plutonium pool of heavy metals to get the standard of life-quality, routine, and happiness that you are used to otherwise – in other times, in other places. That which doesn’t kill you, truly makes you stronger. 

everything is temporary. REMEMBER THAT. Even your “suffering.”

Tweet this.

So when you go back to where the livings easy, you’ll be 10 TIMES the superstar you were before.
It’ll be like having learned to do pushups while wearing a 30 pound weight. Now that the weight is removed, you’ll be able to do 300 pushups like it AIN’T NO THANG!

You’re going to grow your adaptability muscle.

Yes, it feels hard during this training time, but anytime you ever move anywhere else again, or hit a funk again, you’ll be THAT MUCH MORE prepared for how to handle the situation.
It won’t knock you off your feet anymore.
You will be a stronger, wiser version of you to handle and navigate the same challenges with more ease.
It will feel easier not because “it” changed, but because you did!

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photos from: http://getrefe.tumblr.com/  & http://tinyurl.com/qzn3jev

How to Easily Make a Vision Board for

How to RocketLaunch Your 2015 with a Vision

2015 is going to be awesome, and the degree of awesomeness is in your hands.

Main Takeaway: You want to consciously create a VISION for the year ahead.

How:  You can do this by going through a simple journaling ritual + a vision board.

Top 5 Reasons Why

  • Because if you want a specific experience, feeling or creation to occur… you have to see it, feel it, believe in it…and put it into the Universal GPS.
    If you don’t tell the world what you want, it can’t give it to you. And don’t you worry, don’t you worry, child…if you want the “wrong thing,” the Universe will course-correct you, itself.
  • Don’t be afraid of picking a direction, it’s not a blood contract.The secret is that it’s not even about the OUTCOME and getting exactly what you want – it’s just about the journey and enjoying it as much as divinely possible!
  • This process helps to bring consciousness to your choices – choices which you will inevitably make anyways.
  • It’s not about WHAT you do, this is about the HOW of life – how you choose to enjoy life.
  • Visions are way better than New Years resolutions. New Years resolutions make it really easy to just “fail” once – and then it’s done. Visions naturally keep you on the horse, you can’t really call off…you just stay on the horse. Or maybe there is no horse at all. Ya dig?

If you DO want to start the new year with a VISION, here is the practice that I and my bestie used this year. And we’re both coaches, so we’d like to believe we know what’s up! Trust me…I’m a health coach! Haha! 

The Deets: 

Step 1: Create a Sacred Bubble

  • Create a sacred environment for your sacred communion with the Universe. You’re about to co-create together, consciously. It’s like making love. Sure, you can do it behind the bleachers…but isn’t it just nicer with some candles, incense and good music?
  • Same thing here. Create the setting. Whatever you have available at home will work, it doesn’t have to be a big production. For example, I found some sage and a yummy scented candle. You might also have incense available, or some glitter, or flowers, crystals, or inspiring pictures. Put this around yourself. 
  • Visualize a spirit bubble around yourself and your sacred space. It can look kind of like a giant, fantastical soap bubble. It functions as a portal outside of the rules of our everyday reality. Make pretend – kind of like when we played as kids.
  • Inside this bubble, name what kind of values, qualities or feelings you want to experience. For example: trust, safety, love, compassion, bliss, joy, forgiveness, acceptance.Say them outloud: “I invite JOY into this bubble”.
  • You can also do some interior decorating. My friend, also a coach, and I did this together and we decided we wanted some pink magic crystals and humming birds in our sacred space. We envisioned it.
  • Write down all the qualities (and decorations) you called into your space on a piece of paper. This step grounds your vision, and you can keep this paper in the center of your space.

2: Imagine All the Possibilities 

  • Get a piece of paper (or a few) and draw a few circles/bubbles. Start journaling all the possibilities of what could happen in this coming year, in bullet point form, in those circles.
    • EXCEPT …do it all in past tense, as if those things already happened. It could be totally random, like: “learned Spanish,” “learned HTML,” “volunteered at local animal shelter once a week,” “met my soulmate,” “won the MVP award at work,” “launched my own business,” “forgave my parents,” “fell in love with myself,” “moved to Hawaii,” “practiced a Random Act of Kindness commitment,” “ate 10 tons of organic kale.”
  • Get a highlighter and circle all the bubbles that are NON-Negotiable in one color. All the stuff that you just know MUST BE in this year.Get another highlighter and circle a few more bubbles that seem a little scary, perhaps “not realistic” or you don’t know how to make em happen – and circle ‘em too.

3. Journal the Story

  • Write a journal entry, from the day December 25, 2015. It’s your diary from the future. And you’re writing about the year, as it happened, based on the things you circled. Include how you FELT when these things occurred, or didn’t occur.
  • example: “I can barely believe I now speak fluent Spanish, but diary, it’s totally crazy, I DO! This year in May all the financial resources, logistical moments, and my confidence magically came together – and by June I was in Barcelona, lisping away with the best of them for 2 months! I wouldn’t have believed it, but it happened, in ways that were better than I could have imagined. I felt so free, confident, sexy and capable in Barcelona – even while I was totally lost in a new city. I still felt like a superstar rockstar supernova.”

4. Make a Vision Board

  • Get a bunch of magazines and start cutting out pictures that speak to you. They might literally reflect parts of your vision, or they might just resonate with you and you’ll know inside that it’s the one. you can also cut out words. Or you can get fancy and print some pics you like.
  • Yes, theoretically you could make a Pinterest vision board. But there’s a magic to doing it the old-fashioned way – by hand. You’ll PHYSICALLY have it around – and let’s be honest, how often are you going to look at your Pinterest board??? Do the physical real one, and a Pinterest one additionally for fun. There’s nothing like a hand made craft.
  • Then arrange your images on a painting canvas, or super thick cardboardy paper.

FullSizeRender (25)The arrangement process is a zen practice in and of itself. It’s pretty amazing and hard to believe until you live it, but the vision board builds itself. It takes on a life of its own and expresses something deep within you that your thinking mind couldn’t even force. Ride the wave, go with the flow – imagine you’re making a Japanese flower arrangement…and don’t worry about the outcome. It will tell its own story.

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My own vision board turned into two fields of red and then green. I would have never thought that. It expresses a vision of sensuality, passion in red and nature, herbs in green. Who would’ve known that in addition to all my tangible elements of my journaling practice, that this is the overall FEELING that I want to manifest in the coming year. I wouldn’t have know this about myself had I not built it with my own hands and seen it with my own eyes.

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Celebrate your vision board! Take a picture and share it in the Coach Antonia Facebook Page, or post it on the comments below. Also, flaunt it on Instagram and tag @coach_antonia so I can marvel at your work.

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I LOVE YOU!

Happy 2015

Coach A 

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